HOPE

It is January 2nd, we are done with the festivities, and everyone is back to reality. Your New Year's resolution is written, tied and ready to be executed. What is left is you; everything points back

Before we dive into the new year and all it has to offer us, let us start with what pushed me into 2025, what spurred me in my lowest moments, what kept me going in my highest of the highs and what kept me anchored when the chips were down: hope.

I entered 2025 with 500naira in my hand, owing different loan apps and essentially broke and hopeless, the 500naira was a gift from my brother as an offering in church into the new year. The only thing I had to my name was my name, a doting girlfriend, now wife, and my apartment, nothing else. We were told to write down our resolutions for the new year and pray over them. I did not have one; I did not want to think about it, I was essentially hopeless.

But from the many congratulations and the goodwill messages, I was able to latch onto one word: hope. I noticed that not everyone had it all figured out, but we all held onto hope that things would get better, so I decided to cash in on that, too, and I did, a lot.

January started like January always do, slow, methodical, punishing and rewarding at the same time, you start the gym and your body protests, you start savings and you feel like you are loosing money, you start that class and you feel its a waste of time, you even start that writing challenge and you think, what is this going to achieve, but if you are resillient enough, January builds and shapes you, it pushes you to think, to strategize and to lock in on your goals.

I did not have any goals, I only wanted to get paid enough, have a few amount saved and dream of when I can travel the world. I did not know what I was going to do, but I had hope that things would align.

February came with its own problems. I got sick and was hospitalised, cleared most of my loans, did not have any investments (Cowrywise, Piggyvest and SBITC kept reminding me), but I was okay. I got some essentials for my house, but did not make any career progression. I wanted to lay low; we also celebrated my love’s birthday, and we thought to take the next steps.

March had me thinking about why I decided to propose with zero savings, but I got another gig, which I was totally unprepared for. I had to find a way to fit it in with my current 8 am — 5 pm, which I successfully did.

April was cool, I played the fool a bit and got burnt, but I learnt my lessons, my close friend came through for me, and I was shuttling between the mainland and the Island multiple times in a week with nothing but vibes and my laptop.

May came, and I was already feeling the heat. I needed to find a balance quickly, and I also contemplated quitting, but I had awesome friends who would not give up on me: Voke, Kingsley, Chris, Thatcher, and Anas. These guys kept hounding me, asking me how I was doing.

June was tough, 2 months to my wedding, and a lot was yet to be achieved, pressure was mounting, and I also got angry at a family situation, but it still went on smoothly, I got a much needed help and I also had a long phone call with Anas, she knew I did not need advise, I just wanted to rant, which I did, a lot.

July, a month to my wedding and I still had hope that things would work out, what else do I have if not hope? Friends and family came through, and we were looking towards the D-date.

August was a blur; the wedding came and went, and I also had to make an important decision regarding my job. I lost a remote gig that dampened my mood towards the end of the month.

September almost rendered me hopeless for the first time that year. I had to rant to anyone ready to listen. I was angry and burnt out, and I had a new wife whom we were still adjusting to our new reality, but we made it work.

October was my birth month, I had to let go of one gig, and accepted another, not everything went according to plan, but I am grateful.

November and December were a blur of different gigs, just trying to make ends meet. Chuka was a constant during this period; he made it a duty to always call and ask how I was doing and bounce ideas, which I am grateful for. I had to let go of many things I was doing in the name of hustling and decided to focus on one, as a way of resetting and positioning myself for what the new year would bring.

Now this is another January, unlike last year I do have a list, broken down into quarterly goals and I hope to achieve them, a friend told me to abandon hope and accept life as it comes, but I do not think I want to, what will be will be, but I still want to have something to hold on to, as a way not to lose sanity.

I want to challenge myself and write more this year. I want to lean more on my writing this year, even as I navigate adulthood, married life and the ever-changing economic clime I find myself in. Above all, I want to have HOPE.